This was my challenge to myself a couple nights ago: Make a list of words that describe the real me, the me that may or may not be visible to others but the me that I know is in there somewhere. This can be hard to not exaggerate or think too highly of oneselve but to be real and honest. I thought back to when I was a little kid, before the comments and ridicule of life started happening. What was it that I was and still am but have had to modify myself to try to cope (no I’m not really that wounded…but I think we all are more than we realize). Anyways, this is the list that I came up with:
-Adventurous -Prophetic -Calm -Goal-Driven
-Romantic – Beautiful -Truthful/ Honest -Neat Freak/Organizer
-Afraid -Idealistic -Leader -Particular
-Caring -Loving -Stable -Independent
-Persistent -Smart/Intelligent -Tenacious -Control Freak
-Trusting – Writer -Decided -Relationship Driven
-Wise -Singer/Musician -Passionate -Open Book
Then I decided that I would make a list of the “now” me so that I could compare and see what the difference was…Let’s just say, for the sake of time that there is a big difference, I think. I kinda sad actually. But anyways, what I wanted to do was challenge you to do the same. Make a list of who you are. It’s like making a list of goals for yourself almost. Because nobody is who they started out as, because all of us have been lied to or told that we don’t measure up in some way or another. One of my favorite quotes having to do with this is: “You were born an original, don’t die a copy.” Know who you are and what you are created to be so that you can be more discerning of when you are not being the man or woman God intended you to be.
Ashley
(Pardon my non-straight lines)
Eating My Way Through It 
your non-straight lines are pardoned. will I get to see the other list?
well here’s your someone else. I was totally dissapointed when i scrolled down and didnt see a second list. I can understand the fact that some things you should want to keep private. But i think that…well, id like to see it.
You have changed alot from the ridicules, and the criticism, some of which is self inflicted. But these things make us who we are you know?
G-d bless the child within, and G-d bless all that we’ve become. We hope that they wont be too different, and sometimes we must work to recreate the first. BUT it doesnt change the fact that we can turn around and BAM theres perfection right there. Waiting to take a hold of our lives again. Its true. And if we are honest, we can say that the strength and persistance and trials has brung is worth way more than any story book.
I like how you said “idealist,” you remember Lou telling us that “i believe in blissful marriage” well i belive in “happiliy ever afters.” Anybody who tells me otherwise is confused.
esther**
hahahahaha. thats amazing. and the point you made with Song of Solomon is very well put.